15 Terribly Funny Fortune Cookie Fortunes

Lindsay Duncan in Food Trends on Jul 19, 2017

Cracking open a fortune cookie is the perfect way to end a night filled with the most delicious Chinese take out. Often times the fortunes held within the cookie are sweet and positive general comments that can apply to pretty much anyone. Every once in a while though, you will come across a negative or sad fortune…and if you’re lucky, you may just catch a few that don’t make any sense at all. We’ve done some digging and have found 15 hilariously terrible fortunes that will brighten up your day.

1. Your fortune is just as pissed as you to eat healthy.

http://cms.cb.asmsrv.co/cnvyr/cpprimary/590×393/2013-09-13_Stiehl-funny-fortune-cookie-fails-main.jpg Photo By: CMS

2. Sing it with me: “A-B-C-D-E-F-GEEEE!”

http://wac.450f.edgecastcdn.net/80450F/thefw.com/files/2013/02/a0c166905b8a11e28a1722000a9f0a0c_7.jpg Photo By: WAC

3. I didn’t think you could pick a bad cookie..?

http://www.amazing-chinese-food.com/funny-fortune-cookie-sayings.html Photo By: Amazing Chinese Food

4. You don’t have to tell me twice.

http://www.businessinsider.com/the-lamest-fortune-cookie-fortunes-ever-2013-3#-1 Photo By: Business Insider

5. Give me all the cheesy quotes.

https://twitter.com/BrianLim11/status/202067319936122882?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw&ref_url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.businessinsider.com%2Fthe-lamest-fortune-cookie-fortunes-ever-2013-3 Photo By: @BrianLim11

6. Wow, I already felt bad about it!

https://twitter.com/BrianLim11/status/202067319936122882?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw&ref_url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.businessinsider.com%2Fthe-lamest-fortune-cookie-fortunes-ever-2013-3 Photo By: @zac_young on Instagram

7. WHAT.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BWftcAGFu9e/?tagged=fortunecookiefail&hl=en Photo By: @kalimchristman on Instagram

8. Is it though?

https://www.instagram.com/p/BVkqPdjF8Q7/?tagged=fortunecookiefail&hl=en Photo By: @ericgallen on Instagram

9. Uh, well, I’m going to have to call this the farthest thing from wisdom.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BU3UQ8BF3KS/?tagged=fortunecookiefail&hl=en Photo By: @jcdaly317 on Instagram

10. Well, I’ve never considered a fortune’s comfort before…

https://www.instagram.com/p/BSrBXxqBlni/?tagged=fortunecookiefail&hl=en Photo By: @reneereana on Instagram

11. Well, have you ever considered this?

https://www.instagram.com/p/BWGlD1Mg3uT/?tagged=fortunecookiewisdom&hl=en Photo By: @heidiwoelfle on Instagram

12. My mom always told me I was a special, er, glow worm?

https://www.instagram.com/p/BV2azHYgBZl/?tagged=fortunecookiewisdom&hl=en Photo By: @alowlygentleman on Instagram

13. Wait! No!

https://www.instagram.com/p/BVIk2KaFwhJ/?tagged=fortunecookiewisdom&hl=en Photo By: @jacquedante32 on Instagram

14. I feel like I should be offended?

https://www.instagram.com/p/BWut-q6gDKE/?tagged=fortunecookie&hl=en Photo By: @yleniamundo on Instagram

15. Well shucks, you learn something new everyday.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BTzv_VCAYoQ/?tagged=badfortunecookie&hl=en Photo By: @soundsource on Instagram

Lindsay Duncan

Lindsay loves cooking fun and creative meals for friends and family. At home, you can find her trying out a new recipe found on Pinterest while trying to balance her husband's sweet tooth with her healthy eating habits. If she's not in the kitchen, you'll find Lindsay photographing people she loves and going out with friends to try the newest restaurant in her small town.

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